My Blah-Blah-Blog

I don’t usually sit down and review the past year when the new year is just around the corner. Instead I’m usually busy cleaning up Christmas decorations and trying to decide if I have enough energy to stay up until midnight on New Year’s Eve (not really).

This year, however, I’ve been reading through the many “Decade in Review” postings on several websites. When I realized that it was indeed the end of a decade, I decided to think about the milestones, markers and events that shaped my life over the past ten years.

The decade began with heartache as my mom was ill and my relationship with my husband-at-the-time spiraled downward. My mom passed away in September of 2000, and by January of the next year, I’d had my first restraining-order against my husband. I was grateful to many friends who helped me get on my feet with my then-baby daughter.

September of 2001 is of course marked with tragedy of the September 11 attacks. Reconciliation with my husband followed soon after, and my son was born in June of 2002. The rest of that year was fairly decent, but old demons returned in June of 2003 and I learned a big lesson: some people cannot change. By October I was on my own yet again, this time with two kids. Christmas of 2003 was to be the best ever as friends brought gifts and food to me at a time when I had no money for anything. By May of 2004, I was leaving behind everything I had in Colorado and moved to Florida to be with family and to try to start my life over. I lived the rest of that year in fear trying to stay off the radar and hide out from my husband.

In February of 2006 I decided it was time to stop living with people and trying to “survive.” I wanted a better life for me and my two little ones, so I moved to Raleigh, NC to be by my brother. He encouraged me to go back to school, so I enrolled in an online college course and completed my degree with straight A’s.

Soon I had my own job, new friends, a new church and a new lease on life. The day after my birthday in 2007, I was FINALLY able to get a divorce. 2008 was pretty good to me, sans the ever-existing issues with my ex-husband. 2009 turned difficult when tragedy struck my family, this time hitting my daughter with a life-changing event. Through prayer and the support of our church family, we recovered and found another new outlook on life. Summer of 2009 and I met my downstairs neighbor and started a wonderful and healthy dating relationship after years of intermittent dating or just being solo. Can I tell you that years of being solo S U C K S?

2000-2009 was definitely the most difficult decade of my life. Losing a parent is incredibly difficult, watching your child suffer is unbearable. But, like the saying “one day we’ll look back at this and laugh” I can say that I look back at “this” or “that” still with some sadness, but with knowing that who I am today is a stronger, better, healthier person than I could ever be.

And so I think with the closing of this old decade, I’m going to put to bed the past and tuck it in nicely. Then I’m going to turn off the lights, shut the door, and walk away.

I have so much to look forward to: the upcoming decade holds hope and excitement. My kids are getting older and they ALWAYS add so much to my life: funny times, hilarious moments, learning experiences, tender hugs. I want this decade to be better for them, too.

So see you later 2000 thru 2009.

Hello 2010. I have great things planned for you!!!

If you’re in a relationship that is unhealthy or unsafe, you can get away and you can start over. If you or someone you know needs help, contact a local law enforcement agency or check out this website for more information.