Is it a heartless bastard who won’t reply to multiple emails BEGGING to know if child support will be sent this month?

Emails that include messages like “We are running out of groceries” or “we need to pay the bills” and “School starts in 15 days and I have NO MONEY for school clothes or supplies.”

Is it TOO HARD to say “yes” or “no” in a response to “Are you sending child support for July?”

We’re at almost $4,000 in arrears which doesn’t seem like much compared to others who are owed tens of thousands of dollars in late child support, but when you are a single mom looking for full time employment after cut-backs at your employer a year ago, well it’s a lot.

Same guy who couldn’t be bothered to send child support in December at Christmastime. Thankfully my friends and family supported us in an overwhelming way and we had the best Christmas ever. EVER. People we DON’T KNOW sent money to the children and sent presents to the children. Their dad could not be bothered. Although he did send them each a $5 gift card to Toys R Us.

The same guy who speaks with lies “I have a million dollars in the bank” and then says he can’t afford to fly the children out for their winter visit or their summer break as ordered in custody agreement paperwork.

The same guy who says he’s broke but buys a piano and makes all sorts of home projects a priority.

So we’re back in the same boat again – any savings I had are wiped out for lack of monthly child support, we have nothing for school shopping, and I am begging to know if child support will come this month or if it will come at the end of August.

Funny how when I lost my job I asked if child support could come near the beginning of the month and it immediately went to the very end of the month, and then on to every other month at the very end of the month. Seems to be he’s found a formula to keep child support enforcement off his back and to avoid his responsibility to care for his children.

I hope you are reading this (remember you said you monitor everything the kids and I do online.)  Your children are in a tight spot but it’s not making me look bad as you’d hoped. Your comments to them about moving out with you because life is somehow better there than here isn’t making much sense to them. They know the problems we have are not because I’m a bad mom but because you shirk from your responsibility – your COURT ORDERED responsibility – to pay child support to support them. While I don’t remind them every day that you have not paid up, when they need something and we don’t have the money for it, I certainly DO say that we are waiting for child support to come and can’t do much without it.

So think about that for a minute. I’m not covering for you or lying for you and you alone are responsible for the image you are painting for your kids: a dad whose personal life and other commitments are far more important than they are.

Not for long though. I have an amazing man in my life who is showing them that real men keep their commitments, keep their word, honor their responsibilities.  Every day and every week that goes by that you can’t be bothered to call or talk to them is another day and another week that they see how people who really care about them treats them.

Makes me sad for them that they have to experience this, but I know that they are going to come out as strong, healthy adults who also honor their responsibilities and take care of the things they are supposed to.